Great insight

I was lucky enough to steal a moment on the computer yesterday and read this post on my friend's blog. It made me feel better about being a tough mother and gave me some new perspective about the trials I have been through in my life. I hope you all enjoy it and it makes you think like it did me.

More catching up to do

Beckett is a budding photographer

I mostly caught you all up last time on what happened in July. Now for August. Not a whole lot happened during that month except that Beckett had 6 root canals and 2 cavities filled; we put our house up for sale; Matt almost was out of work, but then wasn't; I started counseling; and my sister's dog was diagnosed with cancer and had to have her tail cut off. Wow, I guess that was a pretty packed month.

Yes, Beckett had 6 root canals done plus 2 cavities filled. Zero fun (except for my wonderful Aunt Karen coming to help me out with the whole ordeal. She is always a barrel of fun). At the end of June, Beckett started to complain about one of his molars hurting him. I thought it was just one tooth that need a little bit of drilling and filling. I was so wrong. We went to the dentist in July (yes, it took an entire month to get him into the dentists, this is my only complaint with the office though). First off, Beckett wouldn't sit in the chair. Then the dentist had him sit on my lap, facing me with his legs wrapped around me. Then we leaned him back and had his head resting on the dentist's lap while the dentist tried to look in his mouth as best he could. The report was bad. He told me Beckett would have to have 1 tooth removed and 1 root canal and a couple of cavities filled, but they weren't sure how bad it was until they had him under anesthesia and could get a really good look and some X-rays. Can I just say I felt like the worst mom ever just then. Felt like the biggest failure of a mother.

Anyways, we came back the first week of August for the work to be done. He wasn't allowed to eat for 6 hours prior to the procedure. Lucky for me, it was a Tuesday which meant we would go to the library in the middle of those six hours and that would eat up 2 hours of that time (pun intended) and Beckett wouldn't even think of eating during that time. Then I knew we had a half hour drive to my brother's house to drop off Belle, and then another 45 min. drive to the dentists. It was not easy towards the end. He really wanted something to eat and drink, but thank goodness it wasn't too difficult to distract him.

As stated before, my wonderful Aunt came down from Idaho Falls to help me with Beckett's procedure. She is an Oral Surgeon Assistant and knows how handle stuff like that. I also wanted her there to help me handle seeing Beckett unconscious. I was very worried about that. Especially because Matt wouldn't be able to get off work to be with me. I kept imagining him with a mask over his little mouth and nose, seeing the panic on his face, screaming and fighting to get it off until he would finally relax and just go to sleep (it also didn't help that I knew of someone that died while under anesthesia). Luckily for me, that isn't how it went down at all. The anesthesiologist came out and told me they were going to have him sit on my lap while they distracted him, so he could give him a shot, and then they could take him back to work on his mouth. It really wasn't too bad. They did exactly that and I was very impressed. They brought out a treasure box and had Beckett look through it for a prize and while he was looking, the anesthesiologist pinched his arm and very cleverly concealed the shot in his other hand so Beckett couldn't see it. Then he just stuck him and Beckett gave a little cry, but then he quickly started to slow down. I held him and rocked and told him to relax and in like 3 minutes, he was out, totally catatonic with his eyes wide open. I'm not going to lie, it was very creepy. Then they came and took him away.

We were in there for about an hour when they came out and told me how bad his mouth was and what all they needed to do (6 root canals and 2 cavities in case you forgot). Man, did I feel even worse than before. Not that the dentists ever said anything to make me feel that way, I just did it to myself. They were awesome dentists. I highly recommend them. Then I had to sit for another 1/2 hour, guilt-tripping myself, while they finished up. When it was over, they had my aunt and I go into the back where they had a room just for patients to sleep off the anesthesia. Beckett was out cold on a giant love sac with a nice warm blanket on him and his finger hooked up to a monitor. They had a nice couch for us to sit on and Nemo was playing on the TV in the room as well. My first thought was, "Why couldn't we have sat in here the whole time? This would have made the waiting so much easier then on those hard, crappy chairs in the waiting room." Then I thought how sad my little guy looked.

While we were waiting for him to wake up, my aunt noticed his oxygen levels going down, so she started to rub his leg to rouse him enough to take a good, deep breath. Unfortunately it roused him too much and he woke up, totally disoriented and completely confused as to why his mouth felt so funny. He was crying and I couldn't console him. He just wasn't with it enough to understand where he was and that I was holding him and he was okay. We tried to give him an otter pop to make sure his stomach was good, but he refused to eat it. The dentists told us we were good to go after about 10 min. of his screaming. I'm sure it was for the benefit of his other patients that they wanted us to leave. I was hoping he would fall back asleep in the car, but he didn't. He just cried the whole way to my brother's house to pick up Anabelle. On our way home, we stopped at a Smith's and got him some jello squares that he promptly devoured. After that he was good. He was a little cranky, but nothing too out of the ordinary given the situation.

Yes, our house is up for sale officially. We had it listed "For Sale by Owner" for a few months, but the only people that called us were real estate people wanting us to use them as our agent, so we decided it was about time we actually take one of them up on their offer since no one else wanted to look at our home. We have shown the house two times and one of them sounds really interested. Matt is really excited to sell the house and hopefully rent until we can get rid of some of our debt. I want that too, but I really don't want to leave our house. I love our house. I might not love our neighborhood, but I love our house. I know I am going to cry when we sell it and move out. But, this is part of life isn't it?

The whole thing with Matt's job is really complicated. I have already made this post long enough, so I will try to sum it up best I can. When Matt went out to Omaha at the beginning of July for a job interview, he pretty much told his bosses that he was leaving as soon as he found a job out in Nebraska. They had a replacement found for him in two weeks. Matt trained him for about a month and then he would be done by the end of August. I was a little worried, but then two employees, including Matt's replacement quit, so they almost begged Matt to stay through September. So it all worked out, and I was able to breath a sigh of relief. It has continued to work out good in that they gave Matt a raise in September and he is planning to stay until the end of the year, possibly longer, depending on employment situations out in Omaha. So the next year is a little blurry, but that is okay. We have a general idea of what we want to have happen, but it is constantly changing. Don't be surprised if we get on here and tell you something completely different.

I am still working on getting my depression under control. I started counseling in August and I love my counselor. She is awesome. I have learned a lot and am forced to take time for myself each week. It is hard for me to ask someone to watch my kids while I go and just do something fun, but I am trying to do it. It does make a big difference when I do manage to steal away. I highly recommend it to any mom that isn't already doing it. I don't recommend going to a store. I spent way too much at Shopko last week. Retail therapy is not the way to go.





 

Finally we come to my sister's dog. My sister's dog's name is Satin. She is a black lab that was born about two months before Matt and I got married, so she is 6 years old. She is such a good dog. She just loves kids (especially mine ;-)) and is so good with them. She lets Anabelle just lay on her all the time. We have always had to tell Belle to be soft with the dog, not the other way around. Anyways, half way through August, my sister discovered a lump on Satin's tail. She took her into the vet and found out she had cancer and that they would have to remove her tail, and there was a good chance she might die. We all love Satin and so it was hard on everybody. She is like one of the family. Luckily it hadn't spread, and they were able to remove all the cancer with her tail. She looked pretty sad with a little nub  coming off her shaved rear-end, but now that her hair has grown in, it looks like those dogs that have their tails cut off on purpose, only a little bit shorter. Beckett and Anabelle were kind of affected by seeing Satin with no tail and stitches. Beckett started pretending he was a dog before it happened, and after he saw her tail, when he was pretending to be a dog, he would turn around and say, "Look. My tail is gone. It got cut off." It was cute and sad at the same time. There is still a chance that more cancer will show up later, but we are hoping that it isn't until she is much older.

That is August and I will work on September soon and get you all caught up to speed.

Now that summer is over...

I am going to try and get all caught up on what we did during the summer (well, since June).

There were lots of Popsicles, of course. It wouldn't be summer without them.

There was lots of fun in the sun. Here is Anabelle and her friend Christa trying to be big girls lounging out on the sun chair.

And you can't sunbathe without getting wet.

Beckett wouldn't get in the sprinkler. Here he is running away from it. What a funny kid. When I am setting up the sprinkler each morning, he has no problem playing with that one, but he would barely come near this one. I had to run through it with him. I guess he just likes to play with his own sprinklers.

In July, we went to a park in Riverdale that has a splash park that is FREE. It was such a hot day and the place was packed as you can see. Doesn't it look like a blast?
What is that? You say you can't see Beckett and Anabelle? Well that is because there were here:

They just stood on the sidelines watching. I couldn't believe it. I have chickens for children. I tried to coax them in, but I couldn't get them to join me. I got Beckett a little wet, but Belle refused to go in. She isn't much for getting splashed to begin with, so I am not surprised by her reaction. I was very surprised by Beckett though. He loves to splash and play in water. Once again, I guess if he isn't in the comfort of his bath or yard, he doesn't like it. What a goober.

Speaking of goobers, look what I found in my fridge one day. If you can't tell what that is, it is a fire engine toothbrush. Where do they get these ideas?

We also played a lot outside. The kids started sneaking outside if I didn't take them out to play that day, so I tried to take them out each day, usually while I did yard work. Win, win!

Anabelle also got her bangs cut. Here is a picture of what she looked like afterwards. They were starting to get in her eyes and she wouldn't leave in a barrette to keep them back. Besides she looks better with something on her forehead than with them all swept to one side.

My mom cut them, and then my little sister tried to make them look cuter, but instead just made them shorter. She looked fine, but I like them better now that they have grown in a little more. 

For whatever reason, Anabelle's fashion sense has really come out. Maybe it was the laundry basket full of clothes that I need to go through that inspired her, because she would go take out clothes from there and just pile them on. This picture above is of her wearing 3 tops. The outside one is a dress, inside out, and backwards. The next layer is a shirt that inside out and backwards as well. The bottom one is the shirt I put her in that morning. After she got her outfit on, she wanted me to put her hair in a ponytail (I was absolutely floored that she wanted me to) and then the finishing touch is what looks like a necklace, but is actually one of those ribbon-headband-thingies. I couldn't get a good picture of the ponytail. It was sticking strait out. No joke. It was awesome.

Here is another one of her creations. Isn't it divine? I think I should send her to fashion school instead of preschool. She could be the Mozart of fashion, kind of like that 13 year old girl that started her own fashion critique blog and is now being invited to fashion week in New York.  Only Anabelle could start now. Do you think they would have fruit snacks at those things?

I still have the month of August to get into, and this post is long enough, so stay tuned for more exciting adventures in the Jacob family.

CLICK

In a book that I read once, the mom of the main character would say, "Click. My heart just took a picture.", meaning that she always wanted to remember that moment, even if she couldn't take a picture. I had a couple of those moments yesterday and I just want to share.

At the end of Sacrament Meeting, Beckett and Anabelle both snuggled up to each other on the bench. Now that is pretty cute in and of itself, but they were laying down next to each other on the bench, side by side, without falling off. If my kids weren't so tiny, I don't think they would have been able to pull it off. They were both laying on their tummies, looking at each other and giggling. It was one of the sweetest things. Since taking a picture in church probably isn't appropriate, I didn't get one of them, but my heart took a picture. My favorite part was Beckett's onesie hanging out from under his shirt, over his pants. You don't get much cuter than that.

The other one I took an actual picture of. When we got home from church, we all took off our shoes. I slipped mine off easily, side by side. Belle took hers off, and then placed them neatly right next to mine. How cute is that?!

 I love that even though she was wearing them on the correct feet, she placed them incorrectly next to mine. It is the little idiosyncrasies that make life all that more memorable and special.

I'm nervous

Okay, so tomorrow is going to be a little frightening. Beckett is going to the dentist to have his 5 cavities taken care of. They are going to put him under anesthesia for the procedure and I am really scared. I knew of someone that died under anesthesia while getting their wisdom teeth out, and they were an ADULT. My aunt, who is an oral surgeon's assistant, says she has never had anyone die in the 30 years that she has been working, but that doesn't stop the nagging feeling inside of me. I also know how scared he is going to be while they put him under. It is going to be hard for me to watch, probably as hard as his first PKU at the doctors office when he was 2 weeks and was screaming. I cried during that one, and I think I will cry during this. Luckily, my aunt that I mentioned is going to come and hold my hand during the whole thing and then help me take care of him afterwards. I am just praying that we survive the day without a complete emotional meltdown from both of us. Wish me luck!

A Birthday and the cabin

June was a busy month too. We went to my parent's cabin with just my parent's. We had so much fun. We got in the hot tub, except for Beckett. Last time he got in, he lost his balance and he went underwater and hasn't gotten in for at least a year. But he was happy to go watch Green Eggs and Ham and play with the trains that are kept at the cabin, while we relaxed in the hot tub. Belle loved it. She loved the bubbles that kept coming up. Plus I think she thought it was very fun to take a bath with Mom, Dad, Grandma, and Grandpa all at the same time.

We went to the cabin the second weekend in June, which was when we were still getting lots of rain and it snowed up at the cabin while we were there. We were all content to stay inside where it was nice and warm and play games and do puzzles (one of my dad's and my favorite things to do). But Beckett really wanted to go outside and go fishing. I had been talking up fishing with him for a few days before we went up and he was really excited to go. Finally it stopped blowing freezing air and bundled Beckett up as best we could. Here he is all ready to go catch a fish.

Well, when they got out the lake, Matt said to Beckett, "We're going to go catch a monster fish." For those of us seasoned fisher people, we know that that means we're going to catch a huge fish. I don't think that is what came to Beckett's mind though. Let me finish the story and you will see why. My dad got Beckett all set up with his pole, red and white bobber, worm on the hook, the works. Beckett was having a great time holding his pole. Not long after he was handed his pole, Matt cast his fly pole out into the water and caught a fish almost instantly. Matt reeled it in and as my dad was scooping up the flopping fish into the net, Beckett through down his pole and said, "No fish!" and turned and ran for the cabin without slowing down or stopping until he came in the door. When he got inside, he said to me and my mom, "Monster fish." We had no idea what he was talking about until Matt told us what he said. We all had a good laugh.

I am going to toot my own horn here for a little bit. I caught a nice fish of my own. It was a tiger trout and weighed about 5lbs. Not bad. Normally my parent's have a catch and release policy with their ponds, but the fish was bleeding when we got it out, so we had to keep it. It tasted so good.

We also had a few birthdays in the month of June. One of the children's friends had her second birthday party the first weekend of the month. The kids had so much fun with her presents. Here they all are in the wadding pool that she got. We had to tell them to pretend to have water in there because they kept asking to have water put in the pool.

I show you this simple because it totally influenced Beckett's birthday presents. He loved that pool so much that I got him one of his own. He loved it. He has had so much fun with it. Unfortunately I am a lame mom and haven't gotten any pictures of him playing in the pool. But it was easily his favorite present.

He loved all the rest of his presents that he got too. He got some yard games from my parents, a Crockett set and a horseshoes game.

They loved playing with them. My parent's also gave Beckett a computer game that he can hook up to the TV. The mouse makes him frustrated sometimes, but other than that, he loves to play it.

Here he is opening some more presents. He had to wait a long time to open his presents. He has been so excited to open presents that for the last three months he has been trying to help everyone else open their presents, even without their permission.

Here is his cake. I made it. In case you can't tell what it is, it is a train. The engine is supposed to be Thomas. I made the shapes of the engine and cars, but my sister decorated it. She did such a good job. I am not that creative or good at doing it. She is amazing though and has creativity come out of her ear, so I was more than happy to turn the decorating job over to her.

It was a great party. He had such a great time. He loved his Thomas cake. Beckett had been asking for a Thomas Birthday party for like 5 months. We had a Thomas balloon and he wore his Thomas shirt. It was awesome.

One other thing that happened during June was that we came to a firm decision on moving to Omaha. I guess I should say I came to a firm decision on moving to Omaha. I have been excited about doing it, but I have gone back and forth about it, until one day I just made the decision that we were going to do it. Since then I have just felt good about it. I guess Heavenly Father just wanted me to make a decision and then go forward with it. If it isn't right, he will let me know. So far, we haven't gotten any kind of a no, so we are moving to Omaha. Scared or not, it is happening as soon as Matt gets a job and we sell our home. Stay tuned for the update on July.

She is amazing

So today while I was reading to Belle before her nap, I decided to have her count the kittens on the page with me. She has been into counting lately so I thought she would enjoy it. She counted up to 5! With no help! I couldn't believe it. She is a genius. That or she is a master memorizer. I like genius better.